Darrell from Indiana

My name is Darrell. I gave in-home care to my partner of 11 years, until he passed this past April. I met Tom 30+ years ago and fell in love with him over a period of a few years. This past 2004 I was finally able to move in with him. That was the beginning of the most wonderful relationship. In 2011, he had to have his hip replaced as the old one was eroding away. In 2012, he dislocated his new hip. After dislocating it 3 times in a month, VA decided to operate and find out why. They found a huge pus pocket in the cup which wouldn't let the ball seat correctly. After extensive antibiotic therapy here at home, pick line and all, VA told him he needed to get his b/s under control before they would give him a new hip. Over the past few years, they have come up with new hoops for him to jump through.

Last Dec. the ortho dr told him that he would take the old hip out in March of this year and then after he had healed from that he'd get a new hip in 2016. They sent him for rehab at a nursing home. On April 10th he started hemorrhaging blood so they took him to VA emergency room. They did a scope to find out that he had a ruptured blood vessel in his esophagus. He turned sour on them and they put him on a ventilator. At midnight on the 15th they took him off the ventilator and he lived 4 1/2 hours.

During the past years I had to take care of him here at home with no input from his 3 sons, his brother nor sisters. I did it because I loved him. Dearly loved him. My only regret is that I am in a wheelchair because of having my leg amputated in 2007, so I was not able to give him 100% care which he should have had. I visit his grave every Sunday to talk over things.

Thanks for letting me share how love can work if you let it.