Maggie from Kentucky

Ted is my spouse with Alzheimer’s disease. The indicators began around 2012 when I noticed the symptoms. Slowly he is declining, and caring is getting more frustrating. He refuses to take medication. I gave up the fight. No family here or their support. I have to take him with me if I need to leave the house. I feel we are attached at the hip. We cannot afford respite care or day programs. We have very little left in our savings. Ted wants to eat out all of the time thus the costs involved. I cook every single day, but he’ll say he’s not hungry. I’ve just wasted good food and the expense of that and all the food I prepared. He sustains himself with sweets. That is all he wants. Yes, I buy them for him. It’s easier than an argument.

Beyond that, he cannot drive now although he took the car out months ago while I was resting. Of course, he denied this. A neighbor confirmed his driving. I took his car key without much ado. I will add he was previously diagnosed as a pathological liar with psychopathic tendencies. This has made caring more difficult because I have to decipher what is true or if he’s pretending. This happens often, and I am tired of the confusion. I asked her former neurologist to please request some testing to figure out these tendencies.

I am doing what I feel the Lord has given me to fulfill my obligations. I would prefer to have him in a facility where he will be among his peers and professionally monitored. I am 78 years old with a terminal disease. I speak with friends whose spouses are also Alzheimer’s patients. None have the same issues as I have.

Yet we compare some of the funnier aspects of the patient’s behaviors as often as we can - such as where they hide their stuff or odd habits they picked up. As a caregiver I could continue on here for hours. There’s so much that goes on in just one day. Thanks, for allowing me to share my plight.

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