Kathryn from Texas

My father, Bill, has MDS. He is 79 and lost my mother a year ago after he was caregiver for her for 3 years. Watching him take care of her has helped me in taking care of him. My father has always been very active and social: building decks or rooms, president of this organization or that one, and even handling the entire water system for his community without pay. He is liked by everyone. He's a saint. That's part of the problem. He's very forgetful now (previosly borderline genius) but thinks he should know how to do things. He wants to be independent but can't. He can't even walk across a room without gasping for air. So it makes me feel veey guilty when I get snappy. I retired so I could take care of him, but in doing so, have lost myself. I feel guilty about doing anything fun that he can't do. I wanted to travel but feel gulty about that too. I have the help of my sister in law, but it is hard to let go and even harder since my father wants to be with me all of the time. I've really just started in this arena so I have no advice to give. I just want to make sure I can do the best possible job.

Share Your Caregiving Story Here

+ Tips for sharing your story

This is an update to my family caregiving story that I have already shared.

I also agree that, only when necessary, AARP or its representative may call me with requests for information, as needed to verify my story.

By clicking “Share Your Story”, I acknowledge that I have read and agree to the terms and conditions of AARP’s Release Agreement and agree to receive emails about AARP activities, events, and membership benefits.